I Love an Addict by Malena Lovall

Author:Malena Lovall
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: marriage, lds, healing, parenting
Publisher: Malena Lovall

Coping for Yourself

“Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” (Matt. 11: 28)

If you find yourself stuck under a dark cloud all day, if the wound your addict has opened is hurting you every moment, you are not the first. I used to feel that way too. I found a lot of help in the support group I attended. And most of the others who had just started felt the same way. I could almost see the dark cloud hovering over their head, singling them out, as if in a cartoon. This is a typical stage that we go through. It is normal to feel overwhelmed, like we are drowning under the downpour of that dark cloud, but there is a way to step out from under the cruel shadow.

“I will go before your face. I will be on your right hand and on your left, and my Spirit shall be in your hearts, and mine angels round about you, to bear you up.”

(D&C84:88)

I can tell you from experience that this scripture is true. Our Heavenly Father and His son, Jesus Christ, love you. They are supporting you, and they know what you are going through. They want to help you and have prepared a way for you to endure.

You also have ancestors beyond the veil cheering you on. Some have been where you are right now, with someone they loved snagged by addiction. We don’t always see them, or feel them, but be comforted knowing that you have a whole army of them backing you.

Your family support is not limited by those who have passed either. You should seek help from your close relatives and friends. It is hard to open up to anyone about our loved one’s addiction because we want to protect them, but it is worth the help we can get. If you do choose to open up to someone, seek permission from your addict first. Of course, we have to be careful when we decide to seek support from others. It can be hard for others to understand, so make sure that the person you choose loves your addict too.

But, before anyone can really help you, you need to help yourself. It is often said that an addict’s turning point is when they accept that they have a problem, and when they decide to do something about it. The turning point in our own healing is the same. We have to admit to ourselves that we are hurting and decide that we want to heal.

I have a few friends who kept their pain in hiding. But the abuse they suffered did not hide from them. It ate at them like a parasite, sucking the life out of them. But, like a parasite, keeping it a secret was hurting them more. It not only kept them from healing, but made things worse. Luckily, those friends were able to open up to me about their pain. Finding a

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